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Dear Men of Craigslist, Look, I know you men have it difficult. If you start kissing a woman, and she responds well, and before long, you're both on the floor with her skirt pushed up, and you on top of her, it's not the time to roll onto your back and start awkwardly stroking the top of her head. Start by using all four fingers with firm yet gentle pressure against the outside of her pussy.

Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. Do not charge in with a single finger and start jabbing at things. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do. I'm wearing a low cut shirt and you've been staring at my breasts all night. I'll go slower." Otherwise, skillfully move forward. Do not push the clit like it is a doorbell at some house that you need to get inside of. If she says yes, say something like "I'm sorry - you just look so fucking delicious. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt. It's a simple question, and most women will answer straight out. Trust me, I'm not going to just lie still - I'll get involved. Don't gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. If you are making out with a woman, and she starts to push back, ask nicely if things are moving too fast. Do not, I repeat, do not just wiggle your fingers around her pussy like you're trying to tickle her.